weeks 26-33 with baby #2

ughhh. i am super frustrated with my computer right now. and flickr. every time i log on to post flickr has changed and trying to embed photos has changed and i am just getting really annoyed and it makes me not want to blog ever again!! so anyway, i hate the format of all of this but i am just gonna post it anyway.

so i have slacked on posting, yet again. but this post will just kind of cover the last 9 weeks and where i am at now.

i am 34.5 weeks! yikes. my doctor said i could get induced at 39 weeks if my body is ready. which i doubt it will be since it wasn't that way with ben, but just knowing in my head that could be in 4 weeks and like 4 days just sounds so much more bearable than like 7 weeks haha. in fact, i'll be 39 weeks in exactly one month from tomorrow! i like that i was able to go into labor on my own with ben. i hope that happens with this baby. i don't want to have to get induced and most likely i won't, but we will see what happens. ahhh! i am so terrified and so excited. mostly because i now know what the newborn world is like. its so hard, so wonderful, but so hard. and ben was not the easiest baby, so i think for me, i am even more scared of that stage. but i also feel like i know now that it is temporary. i will survive and eventually sleep again! this time around i will get on post partum depression meds immediately! i am going to try to be easier on myself as far as nursing goes and just go with the flow as far as a schedule. i was so wound up with ben... comparing him and myself to others and i just can't do that this time!

baby is the size of a cantaloupe or a pineapple! 4.9 lbs and 19-22 inches! crazy. there is a full on baby in me.

i have gained about 25+ lbs. depends on the day. yikes. i weigh more than i have ever weighed since i started out this pregnancy heavier than i was with ben. i am trying not to be too hard on myself. i know you lose a lot of fluid after the baby is born and this has been a summer pregnancy so i am sure i am retaining more water.

i have had contractions and lots of braxton hicks. feeling uncomfortable but my sciatic nerve pain and tailbone have been feeling so much better lately. i am sleeping better than i was a month or two ago so that is good!

i am really annoyed with my computer right now and i actually am having some contractions at the moment so i am gonna cut this short, but i may come back and add more later!! here are some pics from the last 9 weeks. my computer is being stupid or blogger and i don't feel like adding how far along i was in each pic but its from weeks 26-33!

a little life update and weeks 22-25 with baby #2

well i am behind on blogging about this pregnancy. shocker i know! we moved a few weeks ago though, and my laptop was in storage, and then when we finally got into the new house, it took us a week or so to get internet. so anyway, i am almost 25 weeks now. yikes. i remember being 15 weeks and thinking if i could get to 25 weeks it would feel so much closer to being done, but now that i am here... i feel like 15 weeks is forever away. but i also feel like that is not enough time. i am so excited to meet this little guy, but also extremely terrified to be a mother of two. ben is extremely active, curious, adventurous, and demands a lot of attention or else he will get hurt or who knows what. i am nervous about how i am going to handle a newborn with a crazy toddler, but i am pretty sure people have been doing it for years, so somehow i will survive. i have just accepted the fact that kids are resilient, my life is no longer about me, and things get better with time. so we will figure it out somehow! being in a bigger house will help. ben absolutely loves our backyard and we have a sliding door to go out there so he is out there ALL the time. i need to figure out a way to childproof it but he already figured it out when i stuck a curtain rod in the door. he knows to pull it out when he wants to go out and he actually locked me out of the house by walking back in and putting the pull in. ugh. talk about backfire. see why i am nervous to have a newborn that demands 24/7 care with a benny? he has gotten his head stuck in the stair rail already and we don't have a lock on this pantry so that's a whole other issue. we will figure it out though.

 i need to do a post on the new house. i will get to it. but we love it here so far. i miss my old bedroom.. it was a lot bigger than this one, but all of the other things about this house make it so much better than the last. we love the neighborhood, the location, the size, the backyard, the layout... we need to do some painting though. ben and the new baby's room are pink right now haha. we got a new kitchen table and when it got delivered on tuesday, i marched right back to RC willey to exchange it. we loved the table but we were deciding between 2. sean of course liked the cheaper one more, so we decided to go with that one, but when it sat in our kitchen it just didn't work. the color was too dark, almost a cherry red, and it clashed with all the other colors in the kitchen. we exchanged it for a different one, that has more of a rustic farmhouse style which is what i wanted in the first place. the other one was a little too traditional for me. it had leather seats and a bench. size wise it was great but this other one will be much better. we got a wood bench to go with it and i picked up some vintage metal bistro chairs today to go with it that will match our counter stools. the new table will be delivered on friday and they will take the one we didn't want haha. anyway, we love the house so far and i didn't mean to go off on that but i will post more about the house later with pictures.

i meant for this post to be about how the pregnancy is going but maybe we will just consider this a life update post. back to the pregnancy though.

how big is baby: in between an ear of corn and a rutabaga. so anywhere from like 8.5 inches to 13.5. about 1-2lbs. every app is different though so its hard to know. he feels huge. i feel him ALL over.

total weight gain: if you go off of my first dr. appt at 11 weeks, i think its like 5 lbs. but if you go off what i think i was before i got pregnant? probably like 12-13. who knows. all i know is that i weighed 10 lbs less when i got pregnant with ben, and i am like 7 lbs away from being what i weighed when i had ben.. haha. so i feel huge knowing that i still have 15 weeks left and i am almost that weight. oh well. i am pregnant. its the one time in my life its good to gain weight and i need to embrace it, even though its hard! i swear like 10lbs of it is in my chest. they almost make my stomach seem smaller because they are so big. i hate them.

sleep: great. except for if ben wakes up i have a hard time going back to sleep. but for some reason when i wake up to pee i can go right back to sleep. unisom helps me wonders.

best moment of the week: hmmm.. this baby has been moving for a while but he has been super super active this week. especially today. sending sean videos of my morphing stomach was a pretty cool moment this week.

food cravings: still tacos 180. and donuts, and ice cream cones or concrete mixers from culvers. and tootsie rolls.

food aversions: nothing really.

symptoms: i am sure if i wasn't on prilosec everyday i would have awful heartburn.. but i got on top of that this pregnancy and its been awesome not having to deal with it. except on the days i forget or run out.. the heartburn is AWFUL. also, at my last appointment i told my doctor about some stomach pains i have been having and she is pretty sure its my gallbladder. not much i can do but take lortab that she prescribed if i need it, and try to eat less fatty and fibrous foods. my back and hips hurt a lot and i have had a lot of braxton hicks and today i have had a lot of cramping.. which feels different than braxton hicks and round ligament pain. its closer to period cramps, which is how it was when i finally went into labor, so that scares me. i am sure its nothing though. maybe just a growth spurt or something. also, i feel like i can't breathe. ever. lung wise and nostril wise. super fun! :)

movement: yes. tons and tons.

gender: boy!

what i miss: i will always say smaller boobs and that will always be my answer.

here i am at almost 22 weeks.



here i am at almost 25 weeks. this picture is deceiving though. the phone and my hand hide my chest so it makes me look a lot smaller than i actually look haha. oh well. ill take it.

weeks 17-21 with baby #2

so the top picture is benny at 20 weeks and the bottom picture is baby #2 at 18 weeks 5 days. technically you could say 19 weeks, since i am measuring 3 days ahead, but it's not enough to change my due date, so whatever. i think their profiles look a lot alike!

so anyway, we had our big anatomy scan a couple of weeks ago. baby boy was no cooperating. he didn't cooperate very well at the gender ultrasound either. he likes to put his hands everywhere that the tech tries to measure. there were a couple of things that the tech noted. baby is breech right now, but so was ben and he flipped before delivery so i am not too worried about that. when we went in, i was having a contraction that made the measuring difficult. my placenta appeared way too close to my cervix during the contraction, but once it stopped she checked again and it was still close, but it's right on the border of it being a concern. the placenta should only move up from here, so she wasn't super worried. he did have a hole in his heart, but she said that usually they close up before they are born. i am thinking they aren't too concerned because i haven't gotten a call from them telling me to come back in. and this boy definitely does not like to show off his parts. ben was so open and not shy at all. this little guy likes to curl up in a ball and not show us anything. she could barely even tell if he was a boy and kept trying to go back but he wasn't cooperating. since she said it was a boy at 16 weeks, i am sticking to that, but it would be nice to have 100% confirmation haha.

i am just going to update on how i am now at almost 21 weeks.

how big is baby: the size of a mango or banana. my apps say about 6.5 inches and 11 oz. he was 11 oz 18 weeks 5 days, so i am sure he is bigger now.

total weight gain: i feel and probably look like i just keep steadily gaining weight, but the doctor said i have only gained about 2 lbs since my 11 week checkup and would like to see me gain more. i think i just gained like 5-7 lbs right at the beginning and have sort of slowed down a little. i am okay with that except i know i still have 20 more weeks to go haha. i will probably gain at least another 20 lbs. so i don't think that doctor needs to be concerned at all. its funny how different things are the second time around. the first time, everything happens sooo slowly. you slowly watch your body change and i feel like that gives you time to sort of accept the changes. the second time, its like your body knows exactly what to do, and things that didn't get a certain size until like 20-30 weeks, just get bigger immediately. your hips, boobs, tummy, face, and everything else just know what to do now. its definitely harder to deal with this time, since it literally happens overnight and i still have a lot longer to go. i do not feel like myself at all, but i know this is only temporary and my body is doing a pretty cool thing. my bump is definitely there but not really round. its actually quite odd shaped. i feel like instead of growing out he's growing up and in. which just makes it so i can't breathe and makes me feel pretty thick and solid from my boobs down to my hips. i would rather grow out so the bump looks a little more obvious and not just like i am filling out majorly and getting chubby haha.

sleep: sleeping great. have to pee a lot but it's not that bad. my body pillow helps a lot and i think im at the point that i can't sleep on my tummy anymore. which is hard because i am a stomach sleeper all the way. 

best moment of the week: feeling lots of kicks! 

food cravings: i have been under a lot of stress lately and have had a lot of stomach pain lately. so eating isnt my favorite right now, but cravings have been buffalo chicken tacos from 180 tacos. i am obsessed. and i still always want candy. i can't get enough tootsie rolls these days. lately though i have been sticking to bland food and just have toast or cereal. and my stomach still hurts!

food aversions: nothing really. not super into meat or veggies but thats sort of how i am when i am not pregnant either.

symptoms: prilosec is a lifesaver. except i ran out yesterday and had AWFUL heartburn today. we made sure to go to costco today and stock up. bad bloating and stomach aches, headaches, and my back is starting to hurt. i think the weight from my chest is really affecting my back. oh and i guess the belly haha.

movement: yes! started feeling him around 18 weeks. much earlier than last time. i feel him often now.

gender: boy! at least i still hope so haha! would love more confirmation.

what i miss: i will always say smaller boobs and taking alka seltzer for stomach aches.

here are some pictures from the last few weeks:

17 weeks

19 weeks


i have had quite a few contractions lately. like i mentioned i have been under a lot of stress, and i know it's not good for me or the baby. we are in the middle of selling our house and buying a new one and moving and it has been incredibly hard on me. i feel like i have maybe developed an ulcer from stress and that could be why my stomach hurts all the time. i will save that all for another post another day.. but if i start talking about it now i will start crying and i have been crying all week, so i won't write about it tonight.

16 weeks with baby #2

well, with my pregnancy with ben, i documented a lot of it. this time around, i have a lot less time to do that. i feel bad that i haven't really written anything down. i am trying to be better. i think occasionally i will do these little survey things if i can find the time! i am 16 weeks now.

how big is baby: the size of an avocado. about 4-5 inches and 3-5 oz.

total weight gain: ugh. i am definitely gaining weight quicker this pregnancy. and instead of really being in my belly, it's all over the place. my boobs have honestly tripled in size. i HATE them. i told sean i want a mastectomy. that's how bad i hate boobs. sorry i just do. i keep feeling like i have gained like 15 lbs already since i weigh that much more now than i did before i got pregnant with ben.. but the truth is i weighed about 10 more lbs before i got pregnant with this baby than i did before i got pregnant with ben. if that makes sense. when i got pregnant with ben, i had lost a little weight from my tonsillectomy so i was already a little smaller than i normally was. with this one we had just gotten back from a cruise (ALL YOU DO IS EAT) and then there was thanksgiving.. so yeah. also, i hate the doctor's scale. i will weigh myself at home and it will be like 3 lbs less than the doctors scale. it makes me mad and confused. also, yesterday i weighed myself and was down like 5 lbs from the day before on the same scale. my weight fluctuates so bad. if i were to make a guess, i would say up 5 -7 lbs, even though it probably looks and feels like more. and after yesterday it being lower i don't even know anymore. let's just say nothing looks good and the only thing comfortable is sweats. and i definitely am bigger. with ben, i was not sick at all the first trimester except towards the end and most of the second trimester. this time i was very sick in the first trimester and would often eat crap to help with the nausea. it's funny to be throwing up but gaining more weight haha. that was a novel. sorry. i really don't care. as long as the baby is healthy i'll weigh whatever.

sleep: sleeping pretty good. but that's because i can still comfortably sleep on my stomach. i don't mean to, but i always end up on my stomach. i know soon i won't be able to though. i don't know how well sleep will be after that. i also take unisom every night to help with nausea so that could be why i am sleeping better. and ben still wakes up occasionally and of course i have to pee 5 times a night. but i am still sleeping okay.

best moment of the week: seeing this cute little guy and finding out he's a guy!

food cravings: i don't know if it's being in the second trimester and not feeling as sick all the time and feeling like i need to eat constantly, but my appetite has definitely subsided. maybe that's why my weight went down a little. really, all that sounds good lately is candy and diet dr. pepper. which is funny because i was on a dirty diet coke kick for soooooo long. 

food aversions: nothing really. but nothing really sounds good either. just haven't been too hungry.

symptoms: with ben i noticed this week i had way bad heartburn.. but this time around i have already started taking prilosec every day and haven't had heartburn in weeks! wahoo! it's been so nice. i wish i would have done this sooner with ben. up until 2 weeks ago tums were my best friend. and i hate tums haha. i have had lots of headaches this week. i do have a bad cold though, so that could be why. i have only thrown up once this week and it was more of a dry heave episode. i am starting to get a little energy back, but that might be because i kind of had no choice with sean being hurt. maybe it was adrenaline? maybe the anti-depressant that my doctor put me on is starting to kick in? who knows? but i have been feeling better.

movement: not yet. well there have been some times i have questioned if i felt something, but nothing yet where i absolutely knew it was the baby. i hear you feel the baby sooner in your second pregnancy, so we will see! 

gender: boy!

what i miss: smaller boobs. i said that last time (well at 17 weeks. i didn't do a 16 week one) and i am saying it again. and fitting into clothes. 

i haven't been taking many pictures this time around. i just have not felt cute at all. not that i felt super cute last time haha. i don't know if it's because i am heavier at this point that i was with ben, and cutting my hair like 2 weeks before i got pregnant? i don't know, but i haven't felt cute at all. please don't think i feel sorry for my self or anything. i just never feel like myself when i am pregnant. nothing fits, and i never get ready anymore. when i was pregnant with ben i had to get dressed and go to work everyday so i had a reason to get ready. this time ben and i stay home most the day in our pajamas. i don't have a picture for 16 weeks but here are some from 10 and 11 weeks. 

10 weeks.

11 weeks.

39.5 weeks

how far along? 39 and a half weeks. the bottom picture was taken at 39. and i was hoping these would be the last belly shots, so i pulled out my nice camera. still crossing my fingers that they are the last shots..

total weight gain: ha, well i made up for the no weight gain for a while. i gained 3 at my last appointment. so i am up about 28-29 lbs. i don't know what happened last week, but my appetite has been out of control. it hasn't been like this the whole pregnancy, but last week... man. i think sean was terrified. i could seriously out eat anyone. i am secretly crossing my fingers that it means labor is soon. my body is trying to store up as much fat/energy as possible.

maternity clothes? basically i just wear sweats and baggy t-shirts all the time. you can say i have given up. i have been avoiding leaving the house at all costs. last week was pretty much my last week at work, unless they need me to come in at all this week. but even when i went in last week, i wore sweats. 

stretch marks? still just under my chest. nothing new from the last update.

sleep: i have very few great nights and a lot of awful nights where i can't stop sweating and my hands and feet are on fire. mostly i don't sleep much.

best moment this week: it's been kind of a rough week. but my dad did surprise me and brought over a diet coke from mcdonalds (in a styrafoam cup) with all my favorite treats because i was having a rough day. he is the best! :)

miss anything? my old body. wearing regular clothes. getting ready for the day and not feeling like i just ran a marathon.

movement: i think he is running out of room. but there has still been some big moves.

food cravings: still donuts and tootsie rolls.. and cheeseburgers and chips. basically any carbs.

anything making you queasy or sick: no not really.

labor signs: still just 1cm dilated 80% effaced. i have had a few contractions here and there and some really bad lower back pain.

symptoms: swelling, pain, feeling LIKE A WHALE.

belly button in or out? still partially in/out. 

wedding rings on or off? it fits but i don't even bother since i hide out at home as much as possible.

happy or moody most of the time: it's been a rough week. i have been pretty moody.

looking forward to: hopefully getting to meet our baby soon. 

i hate mondays. they can bring good or bad news. it's the day of my weekly appointment and i have to get checked and find out how much weight i have gained. i always hurt the rest of the day after that. but it hurts even more when she checks me and i have made no progress in 4 weeks. i am still at 1cm and 80% effaced. she stripped my membranes for me (which sucked) and said, "hopefully i won't see you at your next appointment in a week." but i am not getting my hopes up. she said if i don't have the baby by then, then we can talk about getting induced next friday, when i am 41 weeks. so i guess we just wait and see. there is a 50% chance that stripping your membranes will put you into labor within in 24-48 hours. after getting my membranes stripped i felt awful. i was having lots of pain and cramping. i was planning to go walk the mall after but i felt terrible. on sunday we even skipped out on church and walked the provo mall. judge all you want, i don't mind. i am done going to church until i have this baby (and let's be honest, for a while after that as well). nothing fits anymore and i am so uncomfortable sitting for that long. that is basically why i can't handle work much longer. at least at work though i can get up and walk around a lot. i don't really feel up to getting out and doing much these days. oh well. i need to cheer up! maybe that is why this baby doesn't want to come out! we have both been so anxious and ready for him to come. i really hope i don't make it to my next appointment. today i shoveled the driveway (well attempted. it kept snowing over everything i shoveled so i gave up) cleaned the entire house (AGAIN), went to walmart to stock up on some more food and recovery stuff.. my back ached all day and i had lots of braxton hicks, but here i sit, with no baby yet. he is moving around like crazy as a type this. he has been stretching out so much that is really physically hurts my insides. i keep telling him that there is soooo much more room out here but i guess he isn't buying it... 

38.5 weeks

how far along? 38 and a half weeks. this was taken at exactly 38.

total weight gain: no weight gain since last week. so still at about 25 pounds gained. i think this excessive water drinking really helps... haha. 

maternity clothes? yes. and lots and lots of sweats.

stretch marks? still just under my chest. nothing new from the last update.

sleep: i am getting really anxious so it's been hard to sleep at night. and obviously i am a little uncomfortable. i have taken a few really nice naps though since i haven't been working as much.

best moment this week: getting to say that my baby is due... next week!!

miss anything? just the usual haha. i get repetitive on here.

movement: i think he is running out of room. but there has still been some big moves.

food cravings: donuts and tootsie rolls. 

anything making you queasy or sick: no not really.

labor signs: i am still just dilated 1 cm and 80% effaced. boo. come on body.. start progressing! i did have a few strong contractions on sunday night but they didn't last. my lower back has been hurting like crazy since yesterday though... hoping it's a sign but probably won't turn into anything.

symptoms: just the usual. a little swelling, exhaustion... etc. i take a pill for my heartburn but lately i have still been getting it.

belly button in or out? still partially in/out. more out this week.

wedding rings on or off? still fits but i haven't been wearing much. my hands randomly swell if i am not drinking water 24/7 and i am afraid if i take off my ring during one of those moments i will lose it.

happy or moody most of the time: a little bit of everything. i kinda feel like a zombie at this point. i am just ready to be done.

looking forward to: meeting this baby in a week and a half!!! i hope he comes sooner. but i am guessing he will be late. super bowl weekend.

at my appointment yesterday there was not much news. i haven't progressed and am getting discouraged. i know it doesn't really mean anything to be dilated and effaced and whatnot.. because when the baby is ready, he will come. but still. i hate getting checked every week. i am so sore from it all day and the only thing that makes it worth it is hearing that there is some progression. so to have none for the past 2 weeks is hard to hear. i had some protein in my urine again this time, but my blood pressure is still normal so it's nothing to be concerned about. i know that some people can be 1cm in the morning and have a baby that night.. so that's what gives me hope. but at the same time i know it's normal to be late with your first baby, so i am kind of planning on that. i feel so lazy though not working as much and wish that he would just come so i wouldn't feel like i am just laying around being a bum. there is so much i still need to do, but have no energy to do it. i had a few nesting episodes this weekend and got a few things done so that was good. i still feel like i have so much to do though. i am so not ready for him but SOOOOOO ready. i can't wait to meet him. i tear up just thinking about that moment when sean and i both get to see his face. in the meantime, i will just continue to feel like a ticking time bomb... that will probably never go off, but keeps me anxious and afraid to do anything... haha. i hope this is the last pregnancy week by week update i give... baby blue? your mommy and daddy can't wait to meet you!!

just a few other things.

{sorry here are just a few more random pictures that didn't quite go with my other posts}

> isn't that adorable gold tipped feather banner adorable!? lee made it and gave it to me at the shower! she has made so many cute things for the nursery and i can't wait to show them all off! lee knows the exact look that i am going for. i love it. once the nursery is finally complete, i want maddie to come and take some awesome pictures of it all. we have changed somethings around and ended up getting another dresser. it's not quite done yet, but if baby were to come now it would be just fine!

> this handsome man turned 27 on tuesday. words can never explain how much i love him. i know that is cliche to say.. but i really do love him so much. he really is my best friend. he has put up with so much from me, and i am so lucky. i still can't believe he wanted to be with me forever. he is so excited for this baby and i just know he is going to be such a great daddy. for his birthday we kept it low key. we are still trying to save up as much money as we can since we just paid off all of our student loans debt. we went to dinner at ruby river. his favorite. i gave him 2 batman shirts that he has been wanting for a while. i tried to plan to make him breakfast in the morning but he caught on the night before and decided he wanted breakfast for dinner the evening before. and he ended up making it. so much for me surprising him... haha.

> i drink 4 of these jugs of water a day. and i still have swelling in my hands, feet, and face. but oh well. it seems to help a lot, and i feel better when i do it. i am always thirsty. always. the doctor says everything is normal though and it's normal to retain water at this stage in pregnancy. i think everyone at church thinks i am pretty silly for carrying this around with me all the time but oh well! a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do! also, my mom got me some awesome lounging outfits from victoria's secret to wear at the hospital and after the baby comes.. but i have already been wearing them. even out and about and to work... i love them. this sweatshirt is one of them. i love the PINK clothing line there. thanks for the lounging outfits mom! they already have been and will be put to good use! you are the best!

> my little big moses. i love him so. even when he throws up on my new bedding.. and even though i caught most of it in my hands and had to rush to the toilet to throw it all in there while he was still gagging and it all caused me to have contractions and almost go into labor because i had to chase him around the room with a towel on the floor while he continued to dry heave... i still love him. it was actually pretty comical. and that was a very long, improper sentence. and i don't care. we also found a new thing that he is scared of, aside from the vacuum, blow dryer, blender, my electric toothbrush, and drill. the diaper pail. yes, you read that correctly.

37.5 weeks

how far along? 37 and a half weeks. this once again terrible phone picture was taken at exactly 37. 

total weight gain: well, today at my appointment i found out that i lost 3 lbs. so i am back to what i was a few weeks ago. so that puts my total weight gain at 24lbs. i have been drinking water like crazy and still retaining some so i was surprised i didn't gain more water weight. i am happy though that drinking a billion ounces of water a day is sort of paying off. also though, i hear it's normal to sort of level off and even lose weight at this point as your body is preparing for labor.

maternity clothes? yes. and sean's sweatshirts. basically i wear the same thing everyday at this point.

stretch marks? still just under my chest. nothing new from the last update.

sleep: i am not too uncomfortable at night anymore. i think i have gotten used to it. i am always tired but have been getting so anxious to meet this little man that i am not sleeping as much as i should.

best moment this week: getting to spend time with friends and family! we had an awesome shower this week and got so incredibly spoiled.

miss anything? just the usual. i had a relative at my shower say to me "wow, you really got  the pregnant face going on now." that really upset me. i may or may not have went and cried in the bathroom for a minute. oh and don't worry, i let her know how kind that was of her. anyway, so i guess i miss my old, not pregnant unswollen face. i know it's swelled a little, so no need to have others mention it to me right? oh well. i got over it. sorta. i am about 9 months pregnant. what do you expect? most people say they don't notice a difference, but i can see it and feel it.  especially when i smile. these side profile belly pics obviously hide most of the swelling. oh well. life goes on! 

movement: still a lot of big moves. lots of hiccups. in fact he has them right now.

food cravings: today i really wanted cheddar biscuits from red lobster. so we went to red lobster. yum!

anything making you queasy or sick: no not really.

labor signs: i am still just dilated 1 cm and 80% effaced. 

symptoms: swelling, exhaustion, achy back. on my right side by my shoulder blade, i have had some intense pain. it sucks. but the heating pad helps a ton. also, lee gave me an awesome massage today and it helped so much!

belly button in or out? still partially in/out. more out this week.

wedding rings on or off? on, but i find i am not wearing it as much just in case i start to swell. 

happy or moody most of the time: i am still always all over the place. i have been pretty happy though. feeling so incredibly blessed.

looking forward to: meeting this baby in 2 and a half weeks! and i can't wait to sleep on my stomach again!

today i had my 37 week appointment. lost some weight but everything else was the same as last week. my GBS test came back negative, so i won't need antibiotics during labor. thank goodness, because i am allergic to penicillin and other antibiotics tend to make me sick. the doctor said i was still only 1 cm dilated but my cervix was very soft (still 80% effaced). she probably won't induce or do anything before 40 weeks unless i make more progress. come on baby blue! we are ready to meet you! i hope he gets moving soon. i don't want to still be pregnant in february. everyone in our family thinks i will have him this weekend.. but i am not getting my hopes up at all. i will just plan for february even though the thought devastates me. i have had so much pressure and tons of braxton hicks all week that i thought for sure i must have progressed a little bit. it was kind of sad to see nothing. oh well. he will be here soon enough and i still have so much to do to get ready! i don't think he has even dropped yet, so i should have known there wouldn't be much change. 

i was planning to work less this week but today i worked the whole day. we will see what the rest of the week brings. i still need to finish up some things at work. especially since i might only be going back one day a week after my maternity leave is up. i have to get HMDA submitted before i have the baby. but i also have a lot i need to do at home to get ready. i need to wash all the baby's clothes, get organized, finish reading baby wise, and write thank you cards to all our amazing friends and family. i wrote half for our wedding and never got them out, and i really want to be better this time. i feel so blessed and so grateful for all the many things we received. i will blog about that in another post. also, i need to go exchange some stuff at ikea and get our pantry stocked. i am hoping i will be able to work less this week so i can get some stuff done. if not, i will most likely have all next week to get ready, since i am not getting my hopes up about him coming early. a girl at my work just had her baby and i am so jealous! also, lots of people that i follow on instagram and in my baby apps who are just as far along as me have had their babies recently and it is making me super anxious! i can't wait! anyway... all is well! let's hope baby comes sooner, rather than later! 18 days to go! 

36.5 weeks

how far along? 36 and a half weeks. in this picture i was 36. and also it's really crappy. i got really shaky and lightheaded while trying to take a decent one and this is the best i could do. also, these side shots don't show all the swelling in my face. so if you think i don't have any swelling, just look at me head on and ask me to smile.. ha. i can't wait to have my face feel normal again.

total weight gain: well, i am up 3 lbs from my last appointment. ha. so much for being proud about only gaining 2 lbs in 3 weeks from my last update because i just made up for it by gaining 3 in like 9 days. i have had quite a bit of swelling though and drank 32 ounces of water right before getting weighed. probably not my smartest idea. oh well. i am up about 27-28 lbs now. 

maternity clothes? yes. 

stretch marks? still just under my chest. nothing new from the last update.

sleep: we got some new bedding and i actually feel like it has helped me sleep a lot better. it's a lot more comfortable. however some nights i don't sleep at all and am up peeing every hour. i'm all over the place.

best moment this week: got to hear the heartbeat today. that's always amazing. also i had my first shower on saturday and it was awesome! i'll post about that in a separate post.

miss anything? everything about not being pregnant. ha. i'm tired of the swelling and just being uncomfortable. 

movement: a lot of big moves.. up until today. we talked about this at my appointment today and i was like "oh he moves all the time! no need to worry." but since my appointment i haven't felt him move very much and i am kind of starting to worry. 

food cravings: i have had quite an appetite lately but not everything sounds good. but when it does i inhale it.

anything making you queasy or sick: no not really.

labor signs: i am dilated 1 cm and 80% effaced.

symptoms: swelling in my hands, feet, and face. and probably every where else. let's be honest. nothing fits. it's super attractive. feeling out of breath and extreme exhaustion.

belly button in or out? still partially in/out. 

wedding rings on or off? on still but sometimes when my hands swell i take them off. they fit, but it's just not as comfortable with sweaty, hot hands.

happy or moody most of the time: ha. this past week i have been a mess. just ask my mom, sean, and my co-workers. not my proudest moments. 

looking forward to: having this baby. i can't wait to meet him. i also can't wait to somewhat feel like myself again. i know i'll never be the same, but hopefully i'll be a little bit more comfortable.

i had my 36 week appointment today. i was supposed to go in last friday but they couldn't get me in that morning so i moved it to today. today started my weekly appointments and with those i have the wonderful experience of getting my cervix checked. super awesome, let me tell ya. i am 1 cm dilated and 80% effaced. my abdomen measured 35cm. she could feel his head, so thank goodness for that! i hope he stays down because he has been breech most this pregnancy. i had to get the strep b swab test. hopefully that comes back negative. i also got the pertussis shot because whooping cough is incredibly bad right now and they highly recommend anyone who will be close to the baby to get it. i feel like i have been punched in the arm. also, i am wondering if that could be why the baby hasn't been moving much today? who knows. anyway, that with being checked, i kinda feel like i got the crap kicked out of me today. i also talked to my co-workers about this possibly being my last full time week at work and of course that made me start to cry. it's just been one of those days haha. i am so emotionally and physically worn out. the doctor said that baby could be here tomorrow or he could be here february 7th.. ha. so i am not counting on anything, but sean and i decided it would probably be best for me to slow it down and start to work less. my job is incredibly stressful. especially at the end of the month, and we just want to make sure that i find some time to relax and get ready for this baby. it made feel feel better after we decided that. we both feel that it is the right decision. can't wait to meet you baby blue!!

35 weeks

how far along? 35 weeks. baby could be about 5-6 lbs right now!

total weight gain: 24-25lbs. 25-35 is recommended during pregnancy, so i think i am right on track. with hopefully less than 5 weeks left, i think i will be okay? i hope? i only gained 2 lbs since my last appointment 2 and a half weeks ago, which I thought was going to be a lot more with the holidays and all.. so i was happy about that. i guess a pound a week is recommended at this stage.

maternity clothes? yes. mixed in with regular clothes.

stretch marks? still just under my chest. nothing new from the last update. i keep waiting for them to pop up any minute though. i hear they literally happen overnight.

sleep: it’s actually been a little better. i may have to use 12 pillows and a body pillow but it works. i still get up to pee a million times but i feel like i am not in as much pain as far as my hips and back go. maybe i am just used to it though..

best moment this week: christmas was absolutely amazing. it’s been a great year. we feel really blessed. baby blue got really spoiled by everyone and i am so grateful!

miss anything? lately it has been really uncomfortable to bend over. it’s almost been impossible lately. i miss being able to do things with ease and not getting out of breath just by walking to the bathroom. i miss just feeling like myself. i don't feel like i look or act like myself and it's been rough. i also miss having more options of clothing. i feel like i wear the same thing everyday. i can't wait to be able to wear some of my old clothes again.

movement: a lot of big moves. i think he is running out of room though, so it has seemed to slow down a little.

food cravings: sugar cookies. i made some for a family party and wanted to eat them all myself. also little cuties and mint milk chocolate m&m’s.

anything making you queasy or sick: no not really.

labor signs: nothing really. no more labor and delivery episodes, so that is good.

symptoms: just feeling heavy and out of balance. i have had a really bad cold the past week or so and i think it has actually helped distract me from most pregnancy symptoms. i will say though, having a cold and being pregnant should be illegal. sneezing and coughing every few minutes with a very weak bladder? yeah not cool. let’s just say i had a few unfortunate moments that sean got to witness. plus there is not a whole lot you can do or take on top of already feeling completely exhausted.. i miss Nyquil!

belly button in or out? it’s weird. it is kind of in and kind of out. it’s flush with the rest of my stomach, if that makes sense. sometimes part of it sticks out. hard to explain.. one day the baby pushed it almost all the way out for a few seconds. it was creepy. but kind of neat.

wedding rings on or off? on still. sometimes i take it off though because my hands and feet swell a little bit sometimes if i get too hot. other times it is loose.

happy or moody most of the time: i think for the most part i have been happy the last few weeks.

looking forward to: i have some baby showers coming up! finally! and i can’t wait to meet this little boy in a month!




i went to the doctor today and everything looks great. i no longer have protein in my urine and my blood pressure is still normal. my abdomen is measuring 34.5 cm. now i get to start going to the doctor every week and get my cervix checked when i do. wahoo! can’t wait for that! in case you couldn’t tell i am joking. i am really not looking forward to that, but it will be nice to see if i am progressing at all and get a better idea of when we get to meet our little guy! also, did i mention that my brother and his wife found out they are having a boy too?! i can’t wait! little blue and him will be best buds! sarah is just 17 weeks behind me! the other day my brother asked how big the baby was, since his wife’s baby is about the size of a sweet potato right now, and sean said, “well, he is the size of a baby!” it was pretty funny, but maybe you had to be there… haha. anyway, i can't believe how close we are! i am so excited to meet this little boy!!

a not so fun trip to labor and delivery.

i mentioned in my 31 week post that it had been a rough week. it actually started thanksgiving weekend. i knew i had overdone it with thanksgiving and all, so i took the rest of the weekend pretty easy. i started to feel kind of depressed though and anxious. something just felt off. not right, if you know what i mean? anyway, i had a doctor's appointment on tuesday so sean and i talked about bringing that up with my doctor.

the appointment came and everything looked good. i am measuring right on, the babies heartbeat was great. i still have some protein in my urine but my blood pressure is low, so it's nothing to be too concerned about. i told her about some of the feelings that i had been having and she told me that it's not unusual to feel that way with all the hormones and stuff, but if my thoughts and feelings didn't get better and i started to feel suicidal (which i am not) that we would need to do something about it.

anyway, i left the appointment feeling a little better but my stomach was really starting to hurt. i got into work and hoped that it would go away. keep in mind, the last week/2 weeks of the month at my work is like ten times busier than the rest of the month. it's the reason i have a job pretty much. so needless to say, it has been a pretty busy week or two. i have been stressed. i haven't been feeling great. i have let my emotions take over. anyway, since work is so busy, they order lunch for us during the last week or so. we had kneaders that day and i took a few bites of my sandwich and immediately doubled over in pain. my stomach hurt so bad. we all joked that i was going into labor so it was kind of funny. but really, my stomach hurt so bad. i was actually laying on the ground because it hurt. eventually the extreme pain subsided. everyone asked if i was having braxton hicks. i have had those for the last 2 months so i know what those feel like. this was different. i honestly just thought it was gas, or a really bad stomach ache.

that night sean and i went on a date since he had plans with his buddies this friday. we went down to the riverwoods and got some sushi for the first time since i have been pregnant. don't worry, we only ordered pregnancy safe sushi. happy sumo actually has a list for pregnant women. it was awesome! i was feeling pretty good and was able to eat a lot since i had barely eaten any lunch. after dinner though my stomach started to hurt again and i felt those pains come back. we went home and relaxed the rest of the night. i wasn't able to sleep much because my stomach hurt so bad.

the next night we went up to temple square for mutual. it was a very stressful day at work. we are also in the process of refinancing our house and i was stressing about that because i had to make some decisions and felt like i was on a time crunch. i rushed home from work while on the phone about my refinance, switching between calling sean about it and my work. i barely made it home in time to make it to the church to leave for the activity. i was also upset about a situation at work and i could just tell it was taking it's toll on my body. i met up with sean and some of the others and we hopped in the car and headed towards salt lake. the whole time there my belly was rock hard. normally when i have braxton hicks, it gets hard and then it relaxes. also, it never gets as hard as it was. sean kept feeling my tummy and did say that it felt harder than normal. i was in pain, but it didn't quite feel like the pain from the day before. we walked around temple square and it helped take my mind of things. it started hurting again on the way home.. like an all over pain. i could feel it from right below my ribcage, down to my pelvis.

anyway, i tried to sleep that night and didn't get much of it. the next day was crazy at work again, and i still wasn't feeling great. the lack of sleep was not helping but i figured eventually i would start feeling better. i knew that it's normal for any pregnant woman to have contractions at this stage in pregnancy so i figured since i wasn't bleeding and nothing else was bothering me that i just needed to tough it out. well towards the end of the work day on thursday i sneezed and had a huge gush of liquid rush down my leg. sorry for the TMI. i had just gone to the bathroom though like 2 minutes before and i knew this wasn't urine. luckily this happened at the end of the day so i was able to go home and change. i felt stupid but was pretty sure this wasn't urine. i was looking forward to not having anything going on that night and getting some rest. i knew i just had to feel better in the morning..

well i was wrong. i was up all night in pain. my abdomen was literally throbbing. it was tender to the touch all over. i couldn't sleep at all. i was uncomfortable in any position. i woke up around 4 am with a terrible headache. one of the worst that i have ever had. i took some tylenol and tried to go back to sleep. when i woke up and got ready for the day i was very nauseous and lightheaded. my headache had subsided a little but it was still bugging me. it hurt my belly to walk. it hurt to move. right before i was about to leave for work, i had to lay down because i felt so disoriented and lightheaded.

when i finally felt like i could drive, i headed to work. the last day of the month at my job is the busiest day of the crazy week. we had a lot going on and i felt terrible. i felt so off. i cried on the way to work because i was worried about my baby. it's amazing how much you can love someone that you haven't even met yet. i got to work and tried to ignore the pain. i went out to scan something and my sister maddie was out there. i just started to cry. she came over and comforted me and told me that i should call the doctor. i was emotional and scared and didn't feel like i could call them without crying more, so i called sean and cried to him. he called the doctor for me (he is an angel i tell ya) and they told him that there wasn't much they could do in their office since they don't have the right equipment, but to go into labor and delivery at the hospital if it gets worse. he was actually in salt lake at the time and wouldn't be back until 1. 8-12 is kind of our busy time at work so i just decided to stick it out and if i didn't feel better by then, then we would go when sean came back into town.

and so we did. he picked me up around 1 and we headed to the hospital. i hadn't eaten all day and was feeling so sore and tired. we got up there and checked in and they put us in a room. i had to put on a gown and give a urine sample. they then hooked me up to some monitors. unfortunately little baby is still not in the right position and the only place they could put his heartbeat monitor is exactly where they needed the contraction monitor. they had to move that one down lower which i guess doesn't give the best reading on how strong contractions are, but it would have to do. when we heard and saw the heartbeat on the monitor it made me feel so much better. his heartbeat was great, and he was looking good. but i was having contractions. some pretty strong ones. when i was having them his heartbeat would fluctuate. we waited while the nurse asked me a million questions. finally she went out and called my doctor and then came back in and said that since i was having contractions like that, my doctor wanted to run some tests. this was the uncomfortable part that i never want to relive but it was necessary. they ran some tests to see if that fluid leaking was amniotic fluid. they checked the protein in my cervix or something like that.. because i guess it can indicate whether or not you will go into labor within 2 weeks. they checked to see if i was dilated (which sucked because she had a hard time reaching my cervix and it was incredibly uncomfortable because she kept trying) they also checked to see if i was just having a UTI that actually causes labor symptoms. we were hoping it was just that because once you treat that the symptoms usually subside.

all the tests came back negative. THANK GOODNESS. but that didn't explain why i was having such painful contractions. the nurse said that she was told to give me a shot of morphine to help with the pain, and usually that helps slow down the contractions. well she gave me the shot in my bum and seriously within minutes my contractions slowed right down and so did the babies heartbeat. it was amazing. i felt so much better. my headache finally went away too. the morphine made me pretty sleepy and loopy but i loved it. i felt so much better. since the morphine helped the nurse said that we could go home and i was told i have to take it easy for a while and relax and get lots of sleep. no big activity or anything like that since that didn't seem to help my contractions at all. i know that these were probably brought on by stress, so luckily the month is over and work will slow down for a bit. unfortunately we have a busy 2 weeks ahead of us with work christmas parties, pre-natal classes, and some other things, but i have promised myself and sean that i will take it easy. we don't want this little guy coming early. he still needs to bake for at least 6 more weeks. thankfully if he were to come now, he would have a good survival rate. but still, i want a fully cooked, chubby baby.

i felt pretty embarrassed about going to the hospital. i felt like such a wimp. but they assured us that we did the right thing and clearly i was in pain for a reason. they were so great at the hospital and it made me feel better about delivering at that particular hospital. the nurses were all so nice. after i got wheeled out to the car, we stopped to get some soup since i hadn't eaten all day. i went home that night and slept. it was so nice to get some sleep finally and not be in pain. i slept in today and have taken it easy for the most part. i went to my cousins son's first birthday party and after that went to register at target with my mom and lee. i know that is not really taking it easy, and i wasn't planning on doing it, but my work is throwing me a shower next week and they put on the invite that i am registered. well today was really the only free day i have until then to get it done so we went and did it. they insisted that i ride in a wheelchair though. we got it done quick. to be honest we were mostly just scanning whatever. i know we missed a lot of things and probably registered for the wrong things, but it's over for now and that is all that matters.

i have spent the rest of the night in bed and plan to spend most of tomorrow in bed as well. sorry for the long, drawn out, dramatic story. i wanted to keep track of it on here though. today i have felt much better, just sore. i woke up and felt like my stomach had finally relaxed. the tension was gone. until i started to get ready. it came right back and started to hurt but was not as bad as yesterday. now i just feel sore, like i have been punched in the gut 20 times. little blue has been moving a lot though and i know he is doing fine. i am feeling very lucky that i didn't have any other labor symptoms and that hopefully he won't be coming anytime soon. i still have to take it easy and go in right away if they come back, but the peace of mind that he is okay for now and nothing major is wrong, made me feel so much better.

your dad and i can't wait to meet you little blue. we love you so much. keep cooking so you can be big and strong and chubby when we meet you for the first time. you have lots of people that love you so much already! we are so blessed to have such amazing friends and family who care about us all!