Wednesday, January 6, 2010

shame on me.

i always have weird dreams. i guess that is nothing new. remember this post?
well, i was talking with my sister and friend lee about it, and they asked if i watched weird things before i went to bed. maybe that had something to do with the content of my dreams. well here is what i have come up with from the last 2 nights.


TV watched that night: 
  • The Bachelor,
  •  Conveyor Belt of Love
  •  Overweight Virgin (or something like that. but the dude is not overweight anymore. he was 620 lbs and lost 4oo lbs so he is trying to get into the dating scene. and by dating scene, i mean something a little bit more suggestive and explicit but at the same time totally natural. we are all human.)
Drugs taken:
  • Nyquil at 9:30 p.m. (keep in mind i still have these types of dreams with or without nyquil. maybe it's a combo of everything. sigh)
Dream: well i don't know how to explain this without claiming insanity, but it went something like this;

it stated out in a remote village in the middle of the desert. i spelled that dessert at first and actually thought that would have been a whole lot cooler. hahaha. pun very intended. and then there were all these crazy, mythical, knight dudes, that rode black horses with armour and we were trying to escape from them so we went to this little manufactured home/trailer where my grandma lived and were were watching re-runs of Rocko's Modern Life and we were hiding out from these bad people. then these 2 innocent kids that were actually not that innocent came to the door and then reported back to one of the dark knight dudes with long curly locks that we were hiding up in the trailer. so we were suddenly forced to fly away in this trailer.

well as cool as that was it created some problems. we didn't have much food and were some reason infested with rats. so we had to live in one room at a time and then sanitize and clean it and try to survive off of all the food we had left. well one of the knight's got on his horse that had wings and flew up to the trailer and started shooting the whole thing to pieces with his machine gun. pretty cool right? well i avoided getting shot but everyone else was like swiss cheese.

as i was laying on the ground in the trailer and saw the knight point his gun inside, i kicked him in the face. he fell down to the ground and then i jumped out and ended in a beautiful green meadow and found a lovely sparkling gem in the ground and then suddenly knew i had found "home". whatever that means.

so all in all it was like a lord of the rings meets knight's tale meets the breakfast club. and the dude with the long hair looked like sawyer from lost but had hair down to his bum.

not sure what that is supposed to mean, but maybe me watching the bachelor made me think about knights or something. and the fact that he was a pilot? did that induce the flying horse and trailer?  and where does the overweight virgin come in? sigh. this is far too complex for me to figure out.


TV watched that night:
  • The Biggest Loser
  • Wrong Turn (part of it, but then sean got a little scared so i turned it off)
  • America's funniest home videos)
Drugs taken:
  • Nyquil again. I wasn't feeling to good and was all aches and pains.

well, all i remember about this dream was that i went to Park's Sports early one morning. This is a sport/camping/ outdoor equiptment store, for those that don't live around here. well, i went into the store, and the only reason that i was there was because i needed....

a paper towel. not plural. just one.

i have no idea why, but had to have one before i went into work.  just had to. there were no excuses. so i went into this store, just thinking i could find some in the back, like maybe the workers were cleaning and left a roll laying around. i found them and ripped off a sheet. then i saw this really cool water bottle that was $17 and was ergonomically awesome and i had to have it.

but when i looked up? i realized that i was the only one in the entire store. and it was pitch black outside.

so i put the water bottle down, and then had this moral dilemma with myself. do i take the paper towel, or leave it? what should i do? i couldn't show up to work without it. would i go to hell for stealing the paper towel? then suddenly an employee walked in and said, "boy i had a rough night...." he went off on that and didn't even seem to be slightly suprised that i got in there by myself. so i bought the paper towel and left.

thoughts: i have no effing idea why i had this dream. my sister asked me if i did anything with a paper towel that may have sparked this dream.

the only thing that i can think, is that last night i was attempting to make myself some toast for dinner, and i ripped a paper towel off of the roll to eat it on because i hate doing dishes and want to conserve water and stuff, because we can always plant more trees, right?

i say attempt, because well, let me explain. we have a toaster oven. you have to toast the toast 1 and a half times before the toast is properly toasted. well i toasted my toast and ran back in the other room to watch the biggest loser. i heard the ding go off and saw the toast hadn't cooked, which is typical since it needs to cook 1 and a half times, and i toasted it again. the ding when off and i went in there and the toast was still uncooked.

why you ask? well apparently you have to plug those things in for them to work. huh. and also, apparently it will still ding if it's not plugged in.

shame on you if you fool me once. shame on me if you fool me twice.  guess that saying is incredibly true.

still, that doesn't explain my dreams?

**update. as i was writing about my dreams, something came to me. on monday night sean said i was kicking him really hard. i have no recollection of it. however, i think it was totally me kicking the knight dude in the face when he fell out of the flying trailer!


kayla & tyler said...

BAHA!! that is awesome, you have great dreams. it makes for good stories. Can't wait for the rest of the season of the bachelor and I did watch the conveyor belt of love show or whatever it's called. haha wow!!!!

What the Hale's?! said...

Chloe. You are my twin. I wrote a post about the same thing a couple weeks ago! Someone suggested to me that I sould read something nice (like the Ensign... or something) to get everything crazy out my head so that my dreams aren't so insane... I have not tried it yet, but I bet it works!

Jenni said...

that is hilarious!!! haha. I think its the nyquil.
In other news...I LOVED rocko's modern life!!!!!!!!!!!!

samnhal said...

I'm going to say that perhaps it's the nyquil that's causing the weird dreams? That is awesome that you kicked sean in your sleep. I've been elbowed once in my sleep by my husband. P.S. you do have the plug the toaster oven in to make it work, I've made that mistake before too.

Sydney Swift said...

ahah! these dreams are amazing. the one about the knights was definitely the best, the second one, kind of creepy? i always have odd dreams too. last night i dreamt i was in a really old mansion with a guy i met like once, and he was reciting some lines from a book. over and over, and i was watching him. seriously bizzare.

I am Stacey... said...

Those are awesome dreams! Also, I've definitely tried to make toast without plugging in the toaster. But mine just pops back up right away. That's so weird that yours pretends that it's cooking when it's actually not.

crissy said...

Those are some seriously weird dreams.
I have weird dreams sometimes, too. But I don't watch TV, so I don't have that to try and explain why I dream what I dream (except for the nights that I watch a movie before bed, but that's not very often.)
Maybe you should stop taking drugs before bed ;) just kidding...
I think its funny that you were kicking Sean. Sometimes, when I have really weird dreams I'm afraid I'll talk in my sleep...I guess I do that every now and then...
Ok, I think I'm done.

Elise Halladay said...

I have crazy dreams too. But when I wake up the details slowly start slipping from my mind and then I can't remember anything about it. I just know it was crazy. I also cry a lot in my sleep. My poor husband has to wake me up and tell me its ok. Pretty annoying really.

my name is lauren. said...

pretty sure you have the most elaborate dreams ever. i still have no idea how you remember them.

i think maybe the nyquil is the culprit. even though you say you have crazy dreams can't be you're just having crazy drunk dreams. did you know you can get drunk off nyquil? i just learned this. not saying you get drunk off nyquil, but still...interesting to know it can be done.

oh...and i truly commend you for all of your work to save the environment...conserving water by doing less laundry and dishes. my kind of girl. i totally eat toast on paper towels all the time. craig tells me i'm wasting paper towels, but i can live with it... doing extra dishes? ...that i cannot live with. i'm saving fish craig! gosh!

ok. love you! have to go back to work!

The Boob Nazi said...

I TOTALLY watched part of Wrong Turn last night too! hahahaha

Rasha said...

Too funny. I love love wrong turn its good.

jackiek said...

this is hilarious! i always have the strangest dreams too so i can totally relate! i just found you're blog and your posts make me laugh and smile and i absolutely love it :)

Michael & Mindy said...

I think that whole "TV before bed" thing is crap. It doesn't matter what I watch, my dreams are still weird. Yours at least made sense. I mean, not sense, but things happened in a natural order. Not natural, but like it could be a movie and work, ya know? Unlike my dream the other night where Michael agreed to babysit FOUR yappy dogs and then when the people who were dropping the dogs off left I said "At least we have something to eat" And looked over and it was actually 4 loaves of bread we were tending. See what I mean? Stuff is always transforming and becoming something else. I'm doing something and suddenly I'm someone else, somewhere else, doing something else. It makes my dreams hard to explain.

Liked the pun.

Loved the "everyone else was swiss cheese" line. Seriously, how do you come up with this stuff.

Anyway, I wasn't trying to be all one-upper or anything with teh dream. I hate when people do that. I was just sayin'...

JoJo and Ralph said...

I have 2 or 3 dreams every night and all of them are hysterical. I have no other explaination other than I am a nut job. I try not to be, but I just am and I can't stop. I usually dream about my husband being a jerk to me and then I wake up really pissed at him and he hasn't done anything to me, but all day long I am just mad. Poor guy. But these were really creative dreams. You should just embrace them

Allison said...

This is HILARIOUS! I do not dream that vividly, I think.. at least not that randomly! SO FUNNY.

Jes said...

You are awesome and I love that you actually remember you dreams.

Crazy Shenanigans said...

Those are some crazy vivid dreams!! Maybe it's something your eating before bed. People say that can affect your dreams as well.

♥ Katinka said...

hahaha, hilarious. It's probably a combination of everything!

Celeste said...

hahaah this is awesome. i took some nyquil for my plane trip over but didnt get any dreams nearly as vivid as yours!

grant + brittany said...

thoughts on this post:
first of all, the 620lb virgin.... did we talk about this show when we last hung out or am i dreaming that we did? and we were talking about how he isn't a virgin anymore and now what can they do the show on?

okay i took nyquil two nights ago and I had the BEST SLEEP OF MY LIFE!!!!! that has to have something to do with it. seriously.

chloe who are you.... "everyone else was like swiss cheese" that was so freaking funny to me. ahahhahahahahah

wait and then you jumped into a meadow and found a sparkly gem???

okay it's totally the nyquil.

okay see and toasting something one and a half times is EXACTLY the reason we are selling ours. way too annoying and plus it takes up too much counter space.

the update was the best part if this post. i can totally picture this.

Nicole Marie said...

hahah dreams are so weird!! like so weird sometimes!! i just dont understand why i dream some of the stuff i do. so random!

Amanda said...

Funny dreams!!! Do you ever talk in your sleep during your weird dreams? Apparently I do and did last night and said, "I'll be in a bad mood". Which is sooo true today!!!!

Selma said...

Your dreams rock! :) My dreams are weird, too, but yours are so much worse and so great. ;) haha! This made me laugh, a lot! Can't help you though because I can't understand my own dreams. Loved the update at the end though. Happy Thursday girl.

Michele said...

I am so taking some Nyquil tonight! You have freaking cool dreams:)

Niki {A*Lovely*Lifestyle} said...

lol! i love crazy dreams. i have them quite often. i remember my dreams every night. you need one of those dream books that tells you what they mean.

by the way, thanks for stopping by my blog. and commenting:) you are sweet.