baby names

so sean and i were having a conversation about baby names. and no, we are not planning to have kids anytime soon. but still. you have to have these conversations. you need to know what to expect. just in case your husband might not agree with your future childrens names, you need to have some time to change his mind. so as we were talking about names, sean says this:

"naming babies is tough. they should just come with names ya know? like God sends you a letter with the baby and says "this baby is named _____"

this sentence brought up a memory from my childhood. when i was about 5 years old, i asked for a cabbage patch doll for christmas. when we were younger, we got talking ones that would still talk after you took out the batteries. those freakin' possessed dolls scared the crap out of us. hearing, "do you want to be my friend?" in the middle of the night is destined to freak out a 3 year old.


anyway, when i was older and more mature, i wanted the new crimp and curl cabbage patch doll. i was ready for the responsibility. i was obsessed with babies. i have me on film saying "they give me too many babies!" then my dad says, "Chloe, how old is that baby?" i said "Four!" he said, "Well how old are you?" i shouted proudly, "Free!" as in three. yeah thats right. i was the youngest mom around and was awesome. younger than my own babies. how many people can say that? eh?

anyway. back to the real story. so christmas morning comes and i get my cabbage patch doll. i was so excited. i opened up the box, i pulled out the doll and then my mom said, "oh look Chloe! she came with a birth certificate and a name!" her name was Beatrice. i was pissed. Beatrice? WTF. no offense if that is your name. but as a 5 year old girl, i would not have my child named Beatrice. no freakin way. so what did we do?

we mailed the adoption papers/birth certificate back into Cabbage Patch and had her name legally changed... to Kathy Diane. WTF? no offense if Kathy Diane is your name. but what was i thinking? i was 5? i wouldn't even call her Kathy until i got her birth certificate back. that is how serious i was about this situaion. pshh..and you all think i won't be a good mom... okay. maybe no one has ever said that. but still.

did anyone ever get those American Girl dolls? oh we did. we were obsessed. we got them for christmas one year. maddie got Addy. i got Samantha, and my cousin Kinzy got Molly. we played with them ALL the time. our parents made personalized little chests for each doll where we could house all of their accessories. we were legit.


maddie always got to be poor. she made looking poor seem so awesome. "i am addy, and i live in an alley, and it is lovely and amazing." i was so mad. i wanted to be poor too. she made it look so much fun. so when kinzy said, "i am going to be poor too! i have a brown paper lunch sack. so i am totally poor!" i felt so left out. so i said, "well i am going to be poor too! because everyone knows Samantha was adopted!" maddie says, "umm..you can't be poor because you have a gold lunch tin." freak. why does life have to be so hard sometimes?


anyway. moral of the story for sean? if God sent us babies already with names, we might not like them. they might be named Beatrice, or Dale. and we will just have to go through the long process of getting them changed anyway.