Monday, September 21, 2009

In my dreams...

Dreams...
the other night, i had a dream that i had a baby boy. he was the sweetest, cutest little baby boy in the world. he had the cutest chubbiest cheeks. just like Sean's when he was a baby. brown, wavy kind of long hair. it was not as dark as mine, but darker than Sean's. he had the biggest eyes, and the most infectious smile i have ever seen. he loved me. i loved him. i named him Collin. he was absolutely perfect.

as i was telling Sean about this dream, i realized that he was not with me when i had him. i don't know where he was or what that means. i guess i am no dream analyzer. but it was pretty crazy. i have never had a dream like that before. Sean told me to make sure that he was there when i actually do have a baby. but maybe it wasn't his? i dunno. he did kind of look like he could be James Marsden's kid.. i dunno..just sayin'?

after that i went to Vegas with DJ and Kimmy from Full House. we won the lottery and got stuck on an elevator with Uncle Jesse and LL Cool J. it was freakin' awesome.



so yeah. what do you think that means?


Why?
so the other day i was thinking about life and how i hate shaving my legs and that is lame. but i hate when i haven't shaved my legs either. it's a lose lose because if you don't shave them, they get prickly and your husband doesn't want to spend as much time with you for some reason. i then decided that i wasn't going to shave my legs anymore. if i let the hair get long enough, it won't be prickly and i won't scratch them. also, i am a married woman. Sean doesn't shave his legs. why should i?

who decided that girls had to shave their legs anyway? who decided that we had to wear make-up, and have neatly trimmed eyebrows and long hair? if i could go back in time. i would talk to the person who decided all this. and by talk to them i mean punch them in the face. i mean really, who decided what is feminine and what is masculine? why do girls have to have long hair on their heads but they can't have it on their legs? i know we all think it's gross, but why do we think its gross? who decided that? and who came up with the word gross? why is that a word?

anyway. Sean threw up twice when i told him that i wasn't going to shave my legs anymore. so i told him that i would keep shaving my legs, if he shaved his. and his armpits. EVERY SINGLE DAY. he said NO WAY. i think he is a hypocrite. i bet James Marsden is not a hypocrite.


Tooth News
so i went to the dentist for the 5th time in 3 weeks. yes. 5 times. in 3 weeks. people at my work started to ask if i had a secret part time job over there. i was getting a final filling on my root canal tooth. i have been having some problems with my jaw and the dentist said that i probably eat too much candy. what? me? impossible. i haven't even finished that 2nd bag of frooties yet! so anyway he put me on a soft food diet. he said i can't eat hamburgers, subway sandwiches, candy, bacon, chips. basically i am going to die. it was nice knowing you all.

13 comments:

Sydney Swift said...

i think this is the funniest blog you have ever written. they are getting better and better. i love them, keep writing!

Rachel Leigh said...

no candy=no fun! I am sorry! I agree about shaving legs, my husband gets so grossed out when I don't shave. I purposely didn't shave for 2 weeks just to see what would happen... ha ha! I looked like a man, not quite but that is what my husband said.

@manda said...

HAHAHAHAHA I am laughing because really Chloe I TOLD YOU SO! he he ;) You are so funny! I hope it gets better!

preston. shawnee. cohen. said...

hahaha love the dream. Too funny. I wish I were a dream interpreter, cause I have PSYCHO dreams and always wonder why??
I loved reading this post, cause I always wonder the "why" to everything.. if that makes sense. And I have wondered all of those same things before! Sometimes I hate putting on makeup and getting all ready and it seems unfair that husbands have it sooo easy, but there is a huge part of me too that loves doing my hair and makeup and being what our world considers "feminine." Sometimes I wish we all just went natural and that none of that stuff was ever invented though. Cause if no one knew about it we wouldn't know any different. Okay now I'm seriously just blabbing and going to stop... :)

michael. mindy. dane. said...

I would die, too. You're hilarious! Thanks for the funny post :) And thanks for your sweet comment.

knz said...

Ah! this post gives me flashbacks to a philosophy class I took. The teacher held up a pen and said, "is this a pen?" and we all said "yes" then she said, "well how do you KNOW it's a pen" and we said, "because that's what it is" then she said "well how do you KNOW??"
It made me so mad!!!!!!! WHY waste time on stupid crap like that?! It's just going to make you go crazy. I hated that class. I dropped it. I think too much as it is and do not need to figure out why a pen is a pen or a monkey is a freakin' monkey. Life is too short.

knz said...

but I totally understand what you mean about the whole leg shaving thing. That's different than the dumb pen. The professor should have used that example instead.

Unknown said...

hahaha. reading your blog has become an amazing part of my day with tyler because we just sit here and laugh... you're hilarious.

Michele said...

Soft food like ice cream,pudding and donuts..... I think you will be just fine:) Good luck with your tooth! Hopefully you can give up your "part time job."

Unknown said...

This post is like a glimpse into my mind...weird.

Selma @ Crazy Little World Of Mine said...

I just came across this post and all I can say is you are so funny. Good job!!! :D

Lauren @The Little Things We Do.... said...

i hope your kid looks like james marsden. i hate the fattest crush on him back in the day...all the little girls will love him :).

oh...and p.s. i hate shaving my legs too, but i found that if i shave them every day i hate it less because it takes way less time than if i wait a few days.

but i agree...who decided all these stupid rules???

lame.

Kelly's Adventures said...

I really hate shaving my legs too!

I LOVE YOUR BLOG!