a not so fun trip to labor and delivery.

i mentioned in my 31 week post that it had been a rough week. it actually started thanksgiving weekend. i knew i had overdone it with thanksgiving and all, so i took the rest of the weekend pretty easy. i started to feel kind of depressed though and anxious. something just felt off. not right, if you know what i mean? anyway, i had a doctor's appointment on tuesday so sean and i talked about bringing that up with my doctor.

the appointment came and everything looked good. i am measuring right on, the babies heartbeat was great. i still have some protein in my urine but my blood pressure is low, so it's nothing to be too concerned about. i told her about some of the feelings that i had been having and she told me that it's not unusual to feel that way with all the hormones and stuff, but if my thoughts and feelings didn't get better and i started to feel suicidal (which i am not) that we would need to do something about it.

anyway, i left the appointment feeling a little better but my stomach was really starting to hurt. i got into work and hoped that it would go away. keep in mind, the last week/2 weeks of the month at my work is like ten times busier than the rest of the month. it's the reason i have a job pretty much. so needless to say, it has been a pretty busy week or two. i have been stressed. i haven't been feeling great. i have let my emotions take over. anyway, since work is so busy, they order lunch for us during the last week or so. we had kneaders that day and i took a few bites of my sandwich and immediately doubled over in pain. my stomach hurt so bad. we all joked that i was going into labor so it was kind of funny. but really, my stomach hurt so bad. i was actually laying on the ground because it hurt. eventually the extreme pain subsided. everyone asked if i was having braxton hicks. i have had those for the last 2 months so i know what those feel like. this was different. i honestly just thought it was gas, or a really bad stomach ache.

that night sean and i went on a date since he had plans with his buddies this friday. we went down to the riverwoods and got some sushi for the first time since i have been pregnant. don't worry, we only ordered pregnancy safe sushi. happy sumo actually has a list for pregnant women. it was awesome! i was feeling pretty good and was able to eat a lot since i had barely eaten any lunch. after dinner though my stomach started to hurt again and i felt those pains come back. we went home and relaxed the rest of the night. i wasn't able to sleep much because my stomach hurt so bad.

the next night we went up to temple square for mutual. it was a very stressful day at work. we are also in the process of refinancing our house and i was stressing about that because i had to make some decisions and felt like i was on a time crunch. i rushed home from work while on the phone about my refinance, switching between calling sean about it and my work. i barely made it home in time to make it to the church to leave for the activity. i was also upset about a situation at work and i could just tell it was taking it's toll on my body. i met up with sean and some of the others and we hopped in the car and headed towards salt lake. the whole time there my belly was rock hard. normally when i have braxton hicks, it gets hard and then it relaxes. also, it never gets as hard as it was. sean kept feeling my tummy and did say that it felt harder than normal. i was in pain, but it didn't quite feel like the pain from the day before. we walked around temple square and it helped take my mind of things. it started hurting again on the way home.. like an all over pain. i could feel it from right below my ribcage, down to my pelvis.

anyway, i tried to sleep that night and didn't get much of it. the next day was crazy at work again, and i still wasn't feeling great. the lack of sleep was not helping but i figured eventually i would start feeling better. i knew that it's normal for any pregnant woman to have contractions at this stage in pregnancy so i figured since i wasn't bleeding and nothing else was bothering me that i just needed to tough it out. well towards the end of the work day on thursday i sneezed and had a huge gush of liquid rush down my leg. sorry for the TMI. i had just gone to the bathroom though like 2 minutes before and i knew this wasn't urine. luckily this happened at the end of the day so i was able to go home and change. i felt stupid but was pretty sure this wasn't urine. i was looking forward to not having anything going on that night and getting some rest. i knew i just had to feel better in the morning..

well i was wrong. i was up all night in pain. my abdomen was literally throbbing. it was tender to the touch all over. i couldn't sleep at all. i was uncomfortable in any position. i woke up around 4 am with a terrible headache. one of the worst that i have ever had. i took some tylenol and tried to go back to sleep. when i woke up and got ready for the day i was very nauseous and lightheaded. my headache had subsided a little but it was still bugging me. it hurt my belly to walk. it hurt to move. right before i was about to leave for work, i had to lay down because i felt so disoriented and lightheaded.

when i finally felt like i could drive, i headed to work. the last day of the month at my job is the busiest day of the crazy week. we had a lot going on and i felt terrible. i felt so off. i cried on the way to work because i was worried about my baby. it's amazing how much you can love someone that you haven't even met yet. i got to work and tried to ignore the pain. i went out to scan something and my sister maddie was out there. i just started to cry. she came over and comforted me and told me that i should call the doctor. i was emotional and scared and didn't feel like i could call them without crying more, so i called sean and cried to him. he called the doctor for me (he is an angel i tell ya) and they told him that there wasn't much they could do in their office since they don't have the right equipment, but to go into labor and delivery at the hospital if it gets worse. he was actually in salt lake at the time and wouldn't be back until 1. 8-12 is kind of our busy time at work so i just decided to stick it out and if i didn't feel better by then, then we would go when sean came back into town.

and so we did. he picked me up around 1 and we headed to the hospital. i hadn't eaten all day and was feeling so sore and tired. we got up there and checked in and they put us in a room. i had to put on a gown and give a urine sample. they then hooked me up to some monitors. unfortunately little baby is still not in the right position and the only place they could put his heartbeat monitor is exactly where they needed the contraction monitor. they had to move that one down lower which i guess doesn't give the best reading on how strong contractions are, but it would have to do. when we heard and saw the heartbeat on the monitor it made me feel so much better. his heartbeat was great, and he was looking good. but i was having contractions. some pretty strong ones. when i was having them his heartbeat would fluctuate. we waited while the nurse asked me a million questions. finally she went out and called my doctor and then came back in and said that since i was having contractions like that, my doctor wanted to run some tests. this was the uncomfortable part that i never want to relive but it was necessary. they ran some tests to see if that fluid leaking was amniotic fluid. they checked the protein in my cervix or something like that.. because i guess it can indicate whether or not you will go into labor within 2 weeks. they checked to see if i was dilated (which sucked because she had a hard time reaching my cervix and it was incredibly uncomfortable because she kept trying) they also checked to see if i was just having a UTI that actually causes labor symptoms. we were hoping it was just that because once you treat that the symptoms usually subside.

all the tests came back negative. THANK GOODNESS. but that didn't explain why i was having such painful contractions. the nurse said that she was told to give me a shot of morphine to help with the pain, and usually that helps slow down the contractions. well she gave me the shot in my bum and seriously within minutes my contractions slowed right down and so did the babies heartbeat. it was amazing. i felt so much better. my headache finally went away too. the morphine made me pretty sleepy and loopy but i loved it. i felt so much better. since the morphine helped the nurse said that we could go home and i was told i have to take it easy for a while and relax and get lots of sleep. no big activity or anything like that since that didn't seem to help my contractions at all. i know that these were probably brought on by stress, so luckily the month is over and work will slow down for a bit. unfortunately we have a busy 2 weeks ahead of us with work christmas parties, pre-natal classes, and some other things, but i have promised myself and sean that i will take it easy. we don't want this little guy coming early. he still needs to bake for at least 6 more weeks. thankfully if he were to come now, he would have a good survival rate. but still, i want a fully cooked, chubby baby.

i felt pretty embarrassed about going to the hospital. i felt like such a wimp. but they assured us that we did the right thing and clearly i was in pain for a reason. they were so great at the hospital and it made me feel better about delivering at that particular hospital. the nurses were all so nice. after i got wheeled out to the car, we stopped to get some soup since i hadn't eaten all day. i went home that night and slept. it was so nice to get some sleep finally and not be in pain. i slept in today and have taken it easy for the most part. i went to my cousins son's first birthday party and after that went to register at target with my mom and lee. i know that is not really taking it easy, and i wasn't planning on doing it, but my work is throwing me a shower next week and they put on the invite that i am registered. well today was really the only free day i have until then to get it done so we went and did it. they insisted that i ride in a wheelchair though. we got it done quick. to be honest we were mostly just scanning whatever. i know we missed a lot of things and probably registered for the wrong things, but it's over for now and that is all that matters.

i have spent the rest of the night in bed and plan to spend most of tomorrow in bed as well. sorry for the long, drawn out, dramatic story. i wanted to keep track of it on here though. today i have felt much better, just sore. i woke up and felt like my stomach had finally relaxed. the tension was gone. until i started to get ready. it came right back and started to hurt but was not as bad as yesterday. now i just feel sore, like i have been punched in the gut 20 times. little blue has been moving a lot though and i know he is doing fine. i am feeling very lucky that i didn't have any other labor symptoms and that hopefully he won't be coming anytime soon. i still have to take it easy and go in right away if they come back, but the peace of mind that he is okay for now and nothing major is wrong, made me feel so much better.

your dad and i can't wait to meet you little blue. we love you so much. keep cooking so you can be big and strong and chubby when we meet you for the first time. you have lots of people that love you so much already! we are so blessed to have such amazing friends and family who care about us all!