Thursday, February 25, 2010

miracles.

first off, i want to thank sean for the sweet post below. i had no idea that he was going to post anything. it was honestly the greatest surprise that he could have given me. it was really sweet. i am so blessed and lucky, and even though sean and i tease each other A LOT. it is all in good fun. i love you sean! so much!

so it has been a pretty busy week. i have been a little emotional. on tuesday we received the news that one of my grandma's has cancer. the prognosis is not good. combined with the fact that this was very sudden and unexpected news, i was a bit taken back. in a way it was kind of a wake up call for me.

i guess i get comfortable with life. i often take things for granted, and forget that sometimes things can change in an instant. the other night, i was trying to go to sleep while sean was snoring next to me. i couldn't fall asleep and i couldn't turn my brain off.

i basically summed it all up to this. i am at the stage in my life where i don't know if i should hold on to my youth and try to hold on to the things in my past and the things that feel comfortable to me.. or should i take that step and grow up? walk out into the scary and unknown?

we hear so many conflicting things in this world.

"life is short."
"you have the rest of your lives for that."
"enjoy being young while you can."
"kids can come later."
"you need to finish school."
"don't you want to be a young mom though?"
"there is no going back."
"don't take the things you have or can have for granted."

what are we supposed to do?
this probably makes sense to no one but me.
but oh well.

no, i am not planning to have kids anytime soon. and i am not only referring to that. but i feel like i am stuck at a crossroads. i'm enjoying being selfish right now. i like only having to worry about sean and myself. but then i think, wait. life is short. things could change in an instant. should i be okay with how my life is right now? should we have kids soon rather than later, so we can spend as much time with them on this earth as possible? should we try and by a house? should i go back and finish school? i keep saying, "oh, i'll do that later. i have the rest of my life for that."

but i don't. things can be taken away in an instant. i was really touched by this family's blog. this woman lives in my hometown. she left her children in the tub and ran to grab something for just a split second and her life was completely turned around. her life changed in one instant. and through the power of prayer and kindness of strangers, miracles happened.

as quickly as life can change for the worse, it can be saved by a miracle. my attempts this year (since i don't make goals..haha) are to try and take less things for granted.  i have the best family, a great job, and the most amazing husband. i need to remember that. small miracles happen everyday. me getting out of bed every morning? a miracle. me making sean dinner? a miracle.

i urge you to read her story if you haven't. she is an incredible writer, and she tells this story from her pure and honest heart. in detail. i spent hours reading her blog. and was so happy with the way it ended.


all i know is this..

life is short. it's important to remember the past.

live in the moment. and look forward to the future. 

don't get stuck in one place.

you shouldn't waste your time spending it with those who bring you down.

spend it with those who make you want to be a better person.

spend it with those who will stay up way past their bedtime with you,

even if it is 10:00 and they want to go to bed.. 

just because they know you don't want to be alone.

spend it with someone who sends you 

pictures of baby elephants through out the day, 

because they know you love them.

spend it with someone who will clean the dirty bathroom for you..

 even pulling your hair out of the drain...

 because it frightens you. 

spend it with someone who will refrain from vacuuming 

on saturday morning because they know you like to sleep in.

and it makes you feel guilty while they are being productive

and you are sleeping.

spend it with someone who tries to give you the bigger piece of bread. 

even though you tried to give them the bigger one.

 and then you fight about it.

those are the kinds of things you should fight about.


i guess the rest will all work it self out in it's own time. 
at least that is what i keep telling myself...


i know i don't say it enough on here. but i am so grateful for everyone that reads this blog. whether you comment or not, i think you are all amazing. i never expected anyone to care about the life of sean and chloe. we are crazy. we are random. we can be a little bit annoying at times. but we love each other. and as cheesy as that is? it's all that really matters to me. i have been so overwhelmed (in a good way) with all of the sweet friends we have made through this blog. i am sorry if i don't always comment back. but i love reading all of your blogs. thanks for being you, and for letting us be who we are. there have been times after mean comments, that i just want to quit blogging. or fake how i am feeling. change some posts, or edit or take out things i want to say. but i won't. because i don't want to look back on our life and our little blog and have it be something that it wasn't. so thanks for letting us be us. we love you all!

sorry, i know this wasn't like our typical posts, but it hasn't been a typical week. we're just goin' with the flow :) 

p.s. it's almost friday! YESSS!!! does anyone have any fun plans?

43 comments:

Caitlin said...

Thank you for sharing! Very inspiring post. I have been in that spot before. I try and hold on to the memories of the past a little because they make me who I am. I generally like who I am too. You sure are a lucky gal! Its good to appreciate even in sad times. You and your fam will be in my prayers.

Rasha said...

Cute post and I love the things to remember, I feel this way often too, its a crossroad in life everyone comes too..

and YAY for FRIDAY!

Mary said...

wow, thanks for this post! it was inspiring and motivating and just what i need right now!

xoxoKrysten said...

Thank you so much for sharing this Chloe, one thing I love about the blog world is when I read someone's blog and think, "Oh my gosh I feel the EXACT same way." It's nice to know someone else is going through the same things I am.

Also, I'm really sorry about your grandma. That's such a hard thing to go through. I'm super close with my grandma and she just hurt herself tonight and it's just such a hard shock to go through.

Just surround yourself with good people and talk things out. And kudos to you for sharing all this.

kelly ann said...

this made me cry, chloe. i'm not the best commenter (is that a word? i'm going with yes for now ;)), i haven't commented on your blog in a LONG time. but know i read every post. your blog makes me giggle and is such comic relief, thank you for sharing your humour with us. :) but also, thank you for sharing your heart. especially today. this was so honest and sincere and heartfelt and i think we all need to hear this. i'm so sorry about your grandmother, i'm sending a prayer up for her right now. <3

♥ Katinka said...

...what a sweet post. I know exactly how you feel. I'm kinda stuck too. I wanna be a child but then I realize that is is probably time to grow up. I don't know... life is too complicated. That's why I come here and read your blog. You make me smile!

You guys are wonderful :))

The Boob Nazi said...

Chloe, I'm SO SORRY about your grandma. Seriously. Here's a virtual hug. Also, let's do lunch sometime soon so we can talk about how much cancer sucks.

Niki {A*Lovely*Lifestyle} said...

i like this thoughtful, heart felt post.

it was sweet.

Crazy Shenanigans said...

This post totally hit me. I know how you feel. Reaching a crossroads in life is difficult and sometimes you just have to wait it out to see which way to go. Hang in there and you're right. Never take anything for granted.

Sam said...

I'm really sorry about your grandma :( And I'll keep her in my thoughts! And I know EXACTLY what you mean about the contradictions we hear in life and the biggest one about waiting to have kids versus being young parents. I think about that all the time (even though I'm single..ha) so you aren't the only one. It was so sweet what Sean wrote in the other post. What a perfect husband! You two are such beautiful people and of course we all love you so much and are so happy to get to have a peak into your lives through your blog.

samnhal said...

I'm so sorry about your grandma, loosing those you love is something that's really really hard. I will pray for you guys and send you comfort. I'm so glad that you made this post, it pretty much sums up where I am at in my life right now too. Go back for a masters? Actually find a new job? Have kids? For real join the peace corps in a year? So many stinking questions that effect the rest of your life. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way. I totally become complacent with life also, and forget to enjoy things. Maybe that's why I have wanted to do service really badly. Thank you for this post, and helping me strive to not take things forgranted too.

sarah said...

love this post! i'm sure you and sean will figure out where to go from here. take it a day at a time. don't think too much. let life happen to you. smile more, you're beautiful. xoxo

Alexa Mae said...

chloe: this was very inspirational and can i just say i completely agree with it all. you are amazing, and i adore you. never apologize for the feelings of your heart. i love this post, best one of the week! xoxo

{megs in wonderland} said...

we have the best husbands:) i love the h e double hockey sticks out of you woman.

Caroline said...

Chloe...

This post was absolutely beautiful!!!!! Every last word!! My eyes are welled up with tears lovely lady. I read the story of Bronson and his family, and I am sending them all of my prayers. Chloe... you are inspiring, lovely and I am so thankful to have a dear friend like you. Much love!

Caroline

crissy said...

Life is short, but that doesn't mean you should rush to do something you're not ready for.
You just have to decide what is best for you.

I love your blog and I love how you and Sean are with each other on here. And I love you, for being unashamed to be real.

(Plans for the weekend: nephews 3rd bday party!)
Hope you and Sean have an awesome weekend :)

Geezees Custom Canvas Art said...

very inspiring post!
I am gonna go check out the other blog too.
Life is to short, we all need to stop taking life for granted!
Thank you for writing this!

Michael & Mindy said...

I love this post. Seriously LOVE it. I know exactly how you feel. Serious. Grow up? Stay young? Have kids? Wait? Finish school? Buy a house? All such huge decisions! I was totally the same way about deciding whether or not to have kids, too. I was constantly going back and forth between wanting a baby but wanting to be selfish and give every second of my love and attention to Michael. And I'm not an expert mom or anything (who would be after such a short time??) but I've already learned something way cool. For some reason I had it in my head that when our baby got here I would have to share my love for Michael with the baby. Like, I would have to split it up. Does that make sense? But as soon as Baby D got here? I realized that I still love Michael just as much--actually, way more than ever--and I love my baby too. I just have more love in my heart. I didn't have to give any up for Michael. Does that even make sense?? You probably didn't even mean that, but that is one of the things I thought about when making such a big decision. Anyway..I don't really know how to comment on this post because I feel so much the same way. But I wanted to comment and tell you I agree and that I love you. I love the end where you wrote about the things you know. So awesome and so true. You are so awesome. Seriously. Anyway, rambling comment. Sigh..but once again..I feel ya on this! I wanted this post to keep going because I kept agreeing. I wanted to sit down and chat with you about all this when I finished reading it. And now I'm just having a one-sided conversation via this comment! ha. Kidding. OKay. I'm losing it. Going to bed now. Love you!

Maddie said...

read this in my google reader, loved it! life seems confusing this week eh? i think i'm just not going to worry about staying young or growing old, i'm just going to live today the way i feel like it. tomorrow might be a different story . . . but that's something for future maddie to worry about ;)

p.s. DYHTM?? haha

Michelle said...

Chloe I loved this! This was the best week for me to read something like this. You are awesome.

Michelle said...

ughhh I totally typed out this wonderful comment and the stinkin internet went out for the .2 seconds when I tried to post it. grrr.

But the gist of it was that I feel the same as you described! I never know exactly what I ought to be doing, or trying to accomplish. But I think as long as we are thinking about it, everything will work out as it should. I loved that you said you love your readers and the blogs you read! I feel the same. You guys make me a better, happier, more optimistic person and I am so grateful that you blog!

My prayers are going out for your grandma! I'm so sorry to hear about that... All of my grandparents but one have died from or have had cancer. My love goes out to you and your family!

Selma said...

girl, just know i love you and your cute little blogworld. i love it. you're amazing and no matter what you say, write, think, or share it's marvelous. inspiration to me, it's things that make me think, things that make me jealous a bit too, but in a very good way. even this post is beyond amazing it makes me want to quit my job right this second and move across the world again. it it that time again. it's what life is. life's unexpected. it's beautiful even on ugly days. it's terrific even on cloudy and sad days. it's what it is. and yes we all take it for granted. we may not always admit it but it's the truth. i even take it for granted whereas i absolutely shouldn't. life's way too precious and just a marvelous gift to all of us.
so thank YOU for blogging and for sharing your thoughts. you're a lucky girl, with such a sweet husband and such an amazing life. your family will be in my thoughts. every single day. :)

so, i think this pretty much sums it up. wow, this comment's gotten long. ;) sorry about that.

consider yourself hugged chloé.

xoxo

David and Shalynna said...

You are so darling. I love your blog. You are so real on here. So many blogs can seem fake to me (I'm guilty of this too, I'm sure) but yours is like a breath of fresh air. You write how you feel and the things that happen in your life and it makes me feel like I actually know you!

Prayers sent your family's way for comfort at thus tough time.

Sean's post to you was so so sweet!

olivia rae said...

Chloe - you are so amazing!! And it does make sense, every single word. You are such a special person and I'm so happy I met you. xoxo

J said...

Well said!

kayla & tyler said...

i'm really sorry to hear about your grandma!!! and it's so true, especially for me. When things like having a loved one in a scary situation really gives me a reality check, which probably isn't good. I should always remember how precious life is and how things can change in an instant. I definately need to be more grateful and stop taking advantage of things that are important to me. Thanks for this post, it was really sweet! and I must say all that stuff that Sean blogged about you is so adorable!! you both are lucky to have each other! :)

Amanda said...

Beautiful post Chloe! you are so beautiful inside and out. Thank you for the up lifting post and thank you for always being there for me and my family.

CupcakeSniper said...

Chloe, i loved this post!!
Everything about it! Everything you said was so right.
Don't ever change for anyone's stupidity, who you guys are is what we love!! I hope you're week gets better and I'm so sorry about your grandmother. Know I'll be praying for you guys!!

crissy said...

So, I just read some of baby Bronsons story. Some from the beginning, some from the end. That was not an easy read, especially because (after minor digging) I found out that sweet little boy is only 10 days older than my Ellie. So as I'm reading about their struggles I'm imagining that it is Ellie, and my heart was breaking at their struggle and rejoicing at their miracle.
That was not an easy read, but thanks for linking to it.

Erin said...

I have never commented before and now for the life of me I can't remember how I found your blog but I love it and I look forward to your posts so thank you for being awesome :)

I'm Stacey... said...

Chloe, this was so sweet. Thanks for writing it - it brightened my day!

Jenni said...

Oh I loved this darling. Beautiful words and you are so right. I've started to see the beginnings of wanting a family in the future, but right now i'm content exactly where I am...and I think if things dont happen on their own time then it makes things harder. Example: I pushed myself to go back to school to get it over with, but in a way I wish I had waited at least another semester because I really miss the days of laying around and not worrying about reading assigned books, but reading because I want to read....ok totally random...but I get you. Go with the flow and take the punches as they come.

Randi Lee said...

I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. :-( But I love this post. Life is good, enjoy every moment... no matter what phase in life you are in.

Sandi said...

Life is full of seasons, live for the season your in and don't let the voices of the world distract you!!!!

Chelsea said...

I'm sorry about your grandma. I experienced something similar a few years ago, so I know how hard it can be.

Bronson's story is so amazing. It opened my eyes to so many things--miracles do happen and NEVER take anything for granted. I'm so happy Bronson is ok!

Thank you so much for telling me about your sister's photography! She is way good! I'm talking with someone right now who might do our photos, but she lives kind of far so we're waiting to hear back if it's going to work out. If not, I am for sure getting in touch with Maddie!

And last but not least, those definitely are some big questions that are hard to find answers to. I think there is only so much planning we can do and then we just have to have faith for the rest. At least, that's how we're doing it! :)

Kitty said...

sean, chloe, you two are fantastic. I really admire your relationship with each other, the love. the teasing. the raw truth to it all. no acts. all real. I'm getting married soon! (it just became official last night) and I, as cheesy as it sounds, have been taking mental marriage advice from you and from this blog for quite some time. Marriage and life advice that i'm sure you weren't intentionally giving. But by your examples i've learned so much.

so thanks for sharing.

thanks for being you.

xoxoxo
kitty

The Boob Nazi said...

I've missed you in blog world.

Rachel Leigh said...

i totally know how you feel about being at a crossroads. I am in the same boat... that is a huge part of why I cut my hair off. ha ha. anyways, just wanted to say I know how you are feeling.

PS if you do get a puppy, I would love to make them a collar. Make sure you get a girl puppy so it can have a flower or bow. :)

grant + brittany said...

i haven't even read this post, came back from the cruise and my google reader is bursting at the seams. its really overwhelming. i did read sean's post to you though. freaking cute. anyway i can't see pictures of elephants and not think of you... how CUTE is this....

http://animals.nationalgeographic.com/animals/photos/baby-animals/#2305_600x450.jpg

my name is lauren. said...

chlo....

i love you an enormous amount!

i just spent the last hour on that blog and what an amazing miracle that family experienced. thank you so much for sharing it.

it's so so important to not take life for granted, and not take for granted the people that you love. people like husbands, family and good friends like you.

i am so thankful to have you as a friend beautiful girl.

i hope you had a good weekend!

{The Huffakers} said...

You are so amazing. You pretty much answered your own advice. Life is short but it's also unpredictable. Like you said, live life and be happy with as little regrets as possible. I am so sorry to hear about your grandma. I hate cancer... I know there's nothing I can do to stop it but I still don't like it. If you need anything at all, you let me know ok? I don't care if it's to vent, talk, or ask a question, I am here for ya. Btw, your husband is so sweet I loved his post. You guys are great!!

Michele said...

Life is a wild ride! We just need to follow our hearts and spirits and look back with as little regret as possible for it is all for our growth and wisdom. Enjoy the journey:)

sharlyn emily said...

i dont know how i missed your this post last week, but i'm glad i happened to stumble back across it. i love your blog! i wish i lived near you so we could meet in real life! (: someday, i hope to have a best friend sort of marriage like you do. you guys crack me up! (also, i read the link to the other story.. and cried. at work. i shouldn't be doing this while i'm working. but its how i stay sane. anyway, thanks for sharing)