Wednesday, October 14, 2009

the duggars

last night, sean and i were laying in bed, watching that show about the Duggars..187 kids and counting? or something like that. anyway, the oldest Duggar boy who is only like 20 or something and owns a car business, just had his first baby. or his wife did. i don't know how to phrase that. anyway, the girl, i think he name is Anna, was talking about her pregnancy and how she has a low tolerance for pain.

i couldn't help but wonder what sean was thinking as we were watching this. i said to him,

"oh boy it is going to be so much fun when i am pregnant some day.  you are in for a real treat!"

he said sarcastically, "yay... can't wait."

me: "what? you really think i will be that bad? how do you feel about this?"

sean: "chloe, i think you are going to milk it for all that it's worth."

me: "you are such a jerk! you know nothing about me!!"

sidenote: he is exactly right.

sean: "chloe! i am just saying! i think that you will be fine.. "

me: "this is why you want to wait like 5 years to have kids with me isn't it? you want me to be more stable don't you? you think im going to be pathetic?"

sean: "well, you said it. not me."

me: "wow. thanks for sharing how you really feel."

sean: "i'm just saying!"

chloe: "you think childbirth is easy don't you? of course i will be pathetic. what else would you expect from me? you try pushing a watermelon out of a very small hole. see how that feels eh?"

sean: "well i have had food babies before so i am pretty sure i can kind of relate."

me: "you disgust me. immensely. just because of that? we are never ever having kids." then i rolled over and faced the other direction.

sean: "fine. i will just have to have them with someone else."


more silence.

then i finally say, "well they will probably be ugly. so go ahead."

then we went to bed. we are fine now. i think.

for the record.. i know whoever he has babies with will be cute. but whatever. by the way, i talk about babies on here A LOT huh? i promise there are none on the way or even close to being on the way.

also, i decided that i will be a good pregnant person. laying in bed all day, having sean bring me diet dr. pepper and candy and food? whining about how i don't feel good and sleeping all day? that is my dream life. why wouldn't i want to be pregnant ALL the time? i think michelle duggar is on to something. she has lots of kids, then the older kids have to watch all the younger ones. she is a smart woman.

i want to be like her. except i will wear pants. and maybe do my hair. probably. maybe not. also? i will not name my kids all with same letter. i mean it's hard enought trying to remember 19 names.. why have them start with all the same letter? i would name them in alphabetical order. that seems much more efficient. although the X kid would probably hate me. oh well. i'd hate me too if i had 20 bajillion kids.

(by the way, this is in no way meant to offend anyone that has a lot kids, or wears skirts all the time, and has unique hair. i still love you. and i know that pregnancy will not be a piece of cake. at least not for sean..muahaha)


samnhal said...

Pretty sure that's my plan for pregnancy I just have to wait like 5 years to enact my plan.

Anonymous said...

haaaaaaahahaha the duggars.
and your convo
and the food baby... had me dying there on that one :)
i definitely will milk it as much as i can! thats 9 months of honey can you do this for me? i'll TAKE IT !

Jacquelyn said...

oh my gosh chloe, you make me laugh so hard. you are hilarious! for some dumb reason i am intrigued with the duggar family and always want to watch their show... kyle hates it.

olivia rae said...

hahahahahahah. sounds like a great dream life!!! seriously...

i didn't know they had their own show! i've seen them on the today show a few times, but wow a whole show about them... they are some interesting people.

Rachel Leigh said...

That is a smart woman... making everyone do everything for you all the time! Awesome.

Randi Lee said...

I milk it when I can... ;-)

Michael & Mindy said...

You and Sean are seriously my favorite couple. So funny. You can name the X kid Xander...that's a pretty popular one these days. I think it's the Z kid who will hate you.

Michael & Mindy said...

So who is this Mara? She started commenting on my blog. I was like, how did you find my blog? But she didn't anwer. Then I was looking at her comments and saw a comment from you. So I guess you are our connection? Anyway.

Michael & Mindy said...

I always read your "tweets" or whatever, but I'm always confused. I don't really understand Twitter anyway, but when it says @something I get really confused. And do you know these mormonbachelor pad guys? Because they are freaking hilarious. And I love that I comment on your blog, like, 9 times a day. I'm probably 90% of your traffic feed. Who am I? Why am I acting like we're BFFs? Oh, because we're BBBFLs? What a freak (not you. me).

Michele said...

Sean, Sean, Sean- that boy has ALOT to learn! You CANNOT compare a "food baby" to a real baby! Not even close! I say "milk it" sister and here is a couple of good Z names; Zane or Zack (for a boy)and Zoe for a girl. So I can't wait to meet all 28 of your kids! With that many to pop out you guys better get started and Sean better ask Troy for a raise:)

Kinz said...

I think the U baby would hate you. What names start with U? Ursula, Ulysses...can't think of any real good ones. Are there any?

derek and kimber said...

X can be Xavier or Xena... don't worry chlo, I got your back! :-)

Tara Long said...

I always know I will be smiling or laughing after reading your blog. You are so funny. I love it. I have thought about doing that too (being like the duggars) I mean, especially if we got our own tv show and all, I am sure we'd be doing great with all the fan gifts and money.. . but for some reason my hubby just won't go for having 20 kids. weird.

Lacey, Aj Swenson said...

you are seriously the funniest person on the planet I love it!! I love the duggar family! anyway keep the posts coming cuz you two kill me! a food baby? WTF is that? ill ask aj when he wakes up, I'm sure he will look at me like I'm retarded its actually a daily occurance. sorry about my ranten and raven.

Anonymous said...

Poor Anna! Why was the whole fam-damly looking at her cootch while she was having the baby?!

Creative positions though. I bet that's how she got in that predicament to begin with.

Good thing Mr. Duggar was preoccupied with his brood of kiddos and wasn't there for the show. Good quality family entertainment he missed out on. He only gets the edited version on TLC. :(

Holli said...

First of all- Thank you for commenting on my blod you are really sweet and it means so much to me thank you. Second- I watched this show for the first time last week and it was the episode where the oldest boy josh got married and him and his wife had never even kissed before and so the dad pulled him aside and gave him the same boy that was given to him and his mom when they got married and its all about sex and teh dad goes " So now you know everything your mom and I know about the birds and the bees" and I thought to myself.... WHY WOULD YOU WANT THE SAME INFO AS THEM.... DO YOU WANT 100 KIDS TOO!?!?!??!?!" JEEZE!

Nicole Marie said...


Kjrsten said...

This post is pure poetry.
You are hysterical!
let's be friends!